Why Kids Forget Instructions and Why Cues Help Busy Brains

Anchored Insights

If your child forgets instructions almost as soon as you say them, you are not alone. Many families struggle with this. It often looks like the child is not listening or does not care, but most of the time this is not the case. What you are seeing is a working memory challenge.

Working memory holds information just long enough to use it. Some children lose this information quickly, especially when they feel rushed or distracted. When the mind is full, spoken words slip away before the child can act on them.

Adults experience this too.
Every weekday morning, I leave my lunch bag out on the same counter so I do not forget to pack it. It is not because I do not know lunch is important. My morning mind is focused on getting out the door. The cue helps me remember what matters later. I am not clueless. Sometimes I am just cue-less.

Kids need the same kind of support.

Here are simple ways to help your child succeed:

• Give one step at a time
• Ask them to repeat the step in their own words
• Turn one daily routine into a short visual the child can see without searching
• Point to the cue instead of repeating the reminder

With time, children learn how to use cues to stay organized and calm.
And twenty years from now, these simple tools become life skills that support independence, confidence, and follow-through.

Author:
Dr. Grizelda Anguiano
Anchored Pediatric Mental Health & Anchored Coaching